Thursday, October 31/19
Wishing everyone a Happy Halloween!
It's cold and windy here in Ottawa, so not sure what the turnout is going to be like tonight.
Weather forecasts have been so bad that the city of Montreal has actually postponed Halloween until the weekend in order to protect people.
Jack is going out for a short bit as the rascal loves him some chocolate but my daughter isn't thrilled with the thought and actually tried to bribe him with a trip to Toys-r-Us if he'd agree to stay in....smart little boy negotiated with him grandmother for her to buy him a toy if he came to trick or treat at her house lol
Hope everyone has a good night, remember to keep an eye on those little ghouls and goblins when you are out tonight.
Marcus
Thursday, October 31, 2019
Wednesday, October 30, 2019
Learned Something New Yesterday, Really Wish I Hadn't
Wednesday, October 30/19
I'm all about continually pushing myself to learn new things, to stretch my boundaries, to keep looking outwards to see what life has to offer me.
Normally the things I learn are pretty cool and interesting, at least to me that is.
Rarely do I come away thinking it was a bad experience, at the very least I can add it to the trunkful of useless trivia I've stored over the years that make me the best Trivial Pursuit partner one could ever wish for, I kid thee not my friends.
All of that came to a crashing halt yesterday when I logged into my dating profile and found a message from someone.
Seems pretty innocent enough right? You'd be right for thinking that up until I got to the end of the message and was told that though her profile lists her as single, the truth is that she is in a polyamorous relationship and wanted to meet me to see if I'd be interested in pursuing things with her.
Now to be fair, and I do try to be fair as often as possible, I knew I wasn't really too interested in meeting as she had far too many pictures of her cat and all of the pictures of herself were with sunglasses, a huge red flag for me as I know I've stated in previous posts that I think eyes are one of the first things I notice about a person, especially a woman.
Now I'd never heard this phrase polyamorous used before and she didn't provide any context of what it meant, assuming I guess that I knew what it was all about, which I didn't, until now.
Here is one definition of what it means.....
First off, it's an adjective (makes sense to me so far)
"Characterized by or involved in the practice of engaging in multiple sexual relationships with the consent of all the people involved. Intimacy and trust are essential to a successful polyamorous relationship"
My first thought? What the Fuck!
Now I may be in my mid-fifties, but I'd like to think I'm pretty damn open-minded about things and have seen a lot of changes in my life all these long years.
My take is that this is just an easy way to make one feel good about basically cheating on your partner, and I don't give a damn if it's done with their knowledge and permission, when you take a vow that vow should mean something, it is not to be put aside by mutual consent so one of you can get a taste of something, really someone, new.
Back in the day, a phrase I never thought I'd be using but here it is, this was called something entirely different......swinging
If I had to venture why there's been an evolution in the name it's probably because swinging implied a couple were there at the same time doing it together, whereas, with a polyamorous relationship, each partner seeks out someone on his or her own, just letting the other partner know what is going on, bringing everything into the light and not hiding anything. I guess this alleviates any need to feel guilty for doing the deed, also known as the beast with two backs, with someone who is not legally your partner.
Maybe it helps those who get bored easily and aren't willing to see the potential of just one partner.
I'm sure this is good for those people but I know it's certainly not my cup of tea, I'm all about the one on one and think open communications are all that is needed to keep a relationship fresh, vibrant and fulfilling.
Of course, you could ask what do I know, I've been single since late 2015 when I managed to crash and burn with Corinna. I know this, though we were in a medium distance relationship, not one moment did I ever think of being anything other than true to her, not because I feared the consequences but because that was what she deserved, that was what I deserved, and I could never hurt someone like that, I'd sooner walk away than cheat on my partner.
So you'd be on safe ground to think this guy will never be part of anything other than a true one on one relationship. I'll stay single till my last breath before I'll break that vow.
Actions have meaning and words mean something when said from the heart. I've only told three women I love them in my life, well three in a romantic manner. Maybe that number increases by one should things work out for me going forward but if it doesn't, I'll be okay as the three that did hear it meant something to me, something deep and meaningful for different periods of my life.
My name is Marcus and I think it's high time I start writing entries to my blog.
These are my continuing adventures in trying to be a good father, grandfather, friend, coworker, mastering the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, and fan of the Oxford comma. Did you see what I just did there? lol
Comments, questions, and critiques are always welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Tonight's musical suggestion is "Champion" by Bishop Briggs
I'm all about continually pushing myself to learn new things, to stretch my boundaries, to keep looking outwards to see what life has to offer me.
Normally the things I learn are pretty cool and interesting, at least to me that is.
Rarely do I come away thinking it was a bad experience, at the very least I can add it to the trunkful of useless trivia I've stored over the years that make me the best Trivial Pursuit partner one could ever wish for, I kid thee not my friends.
All of that came to a crashing halt yesterday when I logged into my dating profile and found a message from someone.
Seems pretty innocent enough right? You'd be right for thinking that up until I got to the end of the message and was told that though her profile lists her as single, the truth is that she is in a polyamorous relationship and wanted to meet me to see if I'd be interested in pursuing things with her.
Now to be fair, and I do try to be fair as often as possible, I knew I wasn't really too interested in meeting as she had far too many pictures of her cat and all of the pictures of herself were with sunglasses, a huge red flag for me as I know I've stated in previous posts that I think eyes are one of the first things I notice about a person, especially a woman.
Now I'd never heard this phrase polyamorous used before and she didn't provide any context of what it meant, assuming I guess that I knew what it was all about, which I didn't, until now.
Here is one definition of what it means.....
First off, it's an adjective (makes sense to me so far)
"Characterized by or involved in the practice of engaging in multiple sexual relationships with the consent of all the people involved. Intimacy and trust are essential to a successful polyamorous relationship"
My first thought? What the Fuck!
Now I may be in my mid-fifties, but I'd like to think I'm pretty damn open-minded about things and have seen a lot of changes in my life all these long years.
My take is that this is just an easy way to make one feel good about basically cheating on your partner, and I don't give a damn if it's done with their knowledge and permission, when you take a vow that vow should mean something, it is not to be put aside by mutual consent so one of you can get a taste of something, really someone, new.
Back in the day, a phrase I never thought I'd be using but here it is, this was called something entirely different......swinging
If I had to venture why there's been an evolution in the name it's probably because swinging implied a couple were there at the same time doing it together, whereas, with a polyamorous relationship, each partner seeks out someone on his or her own, just letting the other partner know what is going on, bringing everything into the light and not hiding anything. I guess this alleviates any need to feel guilty for doing the deed, also known as the beast with two backs, with someone who is not legally your partner.
Maybe it helps those who get bored easily and aren't willing to see the potential of just one partner.
I'm sure this is good for those people but I know it's certainly not my cup of tea, I'm all about the one on one and think open communications are all that is needed to keep a relationship fresh, vibrant and fulfilling.
Of course, you could ask what do I know, I've been single since late 2015 when I managed to crash and burn with Corinna. I know this, though we were in a medium distance relationship, not one moment did I ever think of being anything other than true to her, not because I feared the consequences but because that was what she deserved, that was what I deserved, and I could never hurt someone like that, I'd sooner walk away than cheat on my partner.
So you'd be on safe ground to think this guy will never be part of anything other than a true one on one relationship. I'll stay single till my last breath before I'll break that vow.
Actions have meaning and words mean something when said from the heart. I've only told three women I love them in my life, well three in a romantic manner. Maybe that number increases by one should things work out for me going forward but if it doesn't, I'll be okay as the three that did hear it meant something to me, something deep and meaningful for different periods of my life.
My name is Marcus and I think it's high time I start writing entries to my blog.
These are my continuing adventures in trying to be a good father, grandfather, friend, coworker, mastering the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, and fan of the Oxford comma. Did you see what I just did there? lol
Comments, questions, and critiques are always welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Tonight's musical suggestion is "Champion" by Bishop Briggs
Wednesday, October 16, 2019
A Belated Happy Thanksgiving
Wednesday, October 16/19
So last Monday was Thanksgiving in Canada and for the first time in a very long time, I did not prepare a post about the holiday.
Well to be fair, I haven't really prepared many posts in the past couple of months.
I'd like to rectify this omission and say I hope everyone had a wonderful long weekend, I know I did.
What made my weekend so wonderful you ask?
It was filled with family and friends, nothing beats that in my books.
I spent Saturday morning with my daughter and grandson at a pumpkin patch, where we took a tractor ride through corn stalks to hand-pick pumpkins, Jack chose all three and made me laugh so much I was almost in tears. Saturday afternoon was spent sitting on the dirt driveway at my daughter's place helping Jack fill imaginary pot-holes. Yes, you read that correctly, I sat in the dirt and helped my grandson move pebbles around to even out the laneway. Best couple of hours I've spent in a long time. When nap time came around I was told that only poppa could snuggle him as he fell asleep. You could have seen my smile from outer space.
Sunday was the family dinner hosted at my daughter's place. She has an open concept main floor that really works well for large gatherings, there were 15 people all told between family and friends. My ex made the turkey and ham, while my daughter did the side dishes. One added bonus was the extra sugar pie my ex made just for me :)
After dinner, we did something very Canadian and all sat around the fire pit and enjoyed each other's company. I got to talk to my son about how his classes were going and we somehow managed to discuss soccer as well, you'd almost think our family was into the sport or something.
Monday was all about cleaning up the disaster that had become my home office and getting my laptop set up with the two external monitors, my desktop system has been acting up for the past few months and I'd finally had enough.
Of course, once I finished with the office task I headed out to play some golf. It was almost perfect weather and my home course was pretty much empty.
Must have been something in the water as I played lights out for most of the round, bagging a birdie and leaving 4 others just out of reach, I was hitting both my driver and 3 wood perfectly all day. The only dark spot on the game was my putting, I just couldn't manage to read the speed of the greens and 3 putted my way into a 92, a score that easily could have been an 84 or 85!!!
All in all, one of the better weekends I've had in the last several months.
But it did offer me ample time to reflect on the things I am thankful for in my life.
I'm thankful for my health. After the cancer scare last year and this year's little left knee injury I'm happy to still be able to do most of what I like physically. I had my one-year followup last month and things were perfect so the world is my oyster :)
I'm thankful for my family and all the love and joy they bring my way. My kids are my biggest accomplishment and now I can add my grandson to the mix as well. Next year we'll be welcoming a little girl into the fold and I can't wait to lose my heart to her.
I'm thankful for my job and all the variety it brings me day in and day out. Sure there are times it can be stressful with being pulled in multiple directions at once but this same time last year I was contemplating changing jobs as I was totally bored where I was, so onward and upward.
I'm thankful for pushing myself to get out of my comfort zone when it comes to socializing. I've made new friends at work, been out to lunches, and even committed to forming a foursome for our work golf tournament last month. We didn't win, weren't even close, but oh man did we have a blast on the course and at the banquet afterwards, so much so that we are already talking about doing it again next year!!!!!
I'm thankful for eight amazing years with Moki. She gave me strength when I thought the future looked bleak, was always up for a walk or a snuggle, and loved her human with all her heart. I miss that pupper every single day.
Life doesn't always turn out the way we imagine, but that doesn't mean it won't offer ample opportunities to grow as a person and enjoy yourself along the way.
I'm thankful that I have the ability to love and be loved.
My name is Marcus and these are my continuing adventures through life as I try and master the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, be a good father and grandfather, and just maybe, find love once more in my life.
Comments, questions, and even criticisms are welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Today's musical suggestion comes from The Arkells in "Hand Me Downs"
So last Monday was Thanksgiving in Canada and for the first time in a very long time, I did not prepare a post about the holiday.
Well to be fair, I haven't really prepared many posts in the past couple of months.
I'd like to rectify this omission and say I hope everyone had a wonderful long weekend, I know I did.
What made my weekend so wonderful you ask?
It was filled with family and friends, nothing beats that in my books.
I spent Saturday morning with my daughter and grandson at a pumpkin patch, where we took a tractor ride through corn stalks to hand-pick pumpkins, Jack chose all three and made me laugh so much I was almost in tears. Saturday afternoon was spent sitting on the dirt driveway at my daughter's place helping Jack fill imaginary pot-holes. Yes, you read that correctly, I sat in the dirt and helped my grandson move pebbles around to even out the laneway. Best couple of hours I've spent in a long time. When nap time came around I was told that only poppa could snuggle him as he fell asleep. You could have seen my smile from outer space.
Sunday was the family dinner hosted at my daughter's place. She has an open concept main floor that really works well for large gatherings, there were 15 people all told between family and friends. My ex made the turkey and ham, while my daughter did the side dishes. One added bonus was the extra sugar pie my ex made just for me :)
After dinner, we did something very Canadian and all sat around the fire pit and enjoyed each other's company. I got to talk to my son about how his classes were going and we somehow managed to discuss soccer as well, you'd almost think our family was into the sport or something.
Monday was all about cleaning up the disaster that had become my home office and getting my laptop set up with the two external monitors, my desktop system has been acting up for the past few months and I'd finally had enough.
Of course, once I finished with the office task I headed out to play some golf. It was almost perfect weather and my home course was pretty much empty.
Must have been something in the water as I played lights out for most of the round, bagging a birdie and leaving 4 others just out of reach, I was hitting both my driver and 3 wood perfectly all day. The only dark spot on the game was my putting, I just couldn't manage to read the speed of the greens and 3 putted my way into a 92, a score that easily could have been an 84 or 85!!!
All in all, one of the better weekends I've had in the last several months.
But it did offer me ample time to reflect on the things I am thankful for in my life.
I'm thankful for my health. After the cancer scare last year and this year's little left knee injury I'm happy to still be able to do most of what I like physically. I had my one-year followup last month and things were perfect so the world is my oyster :)
I'm thankful for my family and all the love and joy they bring my way. My kids are my biggest accomplishment and now I can add my grandson to the mix as well. Next year we'll be welcoming a little girl into the fold and I can't wait to lose my heart to her.
I'm thankful for my job and all the variety it brings me day in and day out. Sure there are times it can be stressful with being pulled in multiple directions at once but this same time last year I was contemplating changing jobs as I was totally bored where I was, so onward and upward.
I'm thankful for pushing myself to get out of my comfort zone when it comes to socializing. I've made new friends at work, been out to lunches, and even committed to forming a foursome for our work golf tournament last month. We didn't win, weren't even close, but oh man did we have a blast on the course and at the banquet afterwards, so much so that we are already talking about doing it again next year!!!!!
I'm thankful for eight amazing years with Moki. She gave me strength when I thought the future looked bleak, was always up for a walk or a snuggle, and loved her human with all her heart. I miss that pupper every single day.
Life doesn't always turn out the way we imagine, but that doesn't mean it won't offer ample opportunities to grow as a person and enjoy yourself along the way.
I'm thankful that I have the ability to love and be loved.
My name is Marcus and these are my continuing adventures through life as I try and master the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, be a good father and grandfather, and just maybe, find love once more in my life.
Comments, questions, and even criticisms are welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Today's musical suggestion comes from The Arkells in "Hand Me Downs"
Tuesday, October 1, 2019
Moki...........
Tuesday, October 1st, 2019
I've had three really horrible days in my life.
The first came when I got the call on April 9th, 1998 that my mom had passed away.
The second happened on December 4th, 2009 and involved having a neurosurgeon advise me that the surgery he proposed to relieve cranial pressure on my son's brain due to a sinus infection had a 50/50 chance of saving his life or killing him.
The third was less than two weeks ago when I had to make the decision to let go of Moki and have her put under as she was in pain and there was no way I could let her suffer.
I've been struggling with that loss every single day, fighting back both my tears and anger at the oddest moments.
Moki had slowly been getting worse from her lymphoma but not to the extent that I thought we were even close to having to make that call, but something happened between the time I left for work on that Wednesday and the time I came home that put her over the tipping point.
We were told 2-6 months back in January and were given almost 3 months more to spend with her.
We tried to take her for as many walks in her park as we could and shared far more treats with her in these last few months than she'd ever had in the prior 7 years, including table scraps that made her tail wag with happiness.
She was the most wonderful puppy anyone could ever have asked for. She was kind, affectionate, caring, and empathetic.
Last year when I had my cancer scare and was off work for 2 months dealing with the adverse reaction to the chemo I was given post-surgery, that pupper never left my side, always snuggling with me to let me know she loved me and had my back.
Over the last two week's I've received so many reminders about her from little things around the house to memory tickler from FaceBook of a picture, I had taken of her back in 2015 curled up in Corinna's lap, both of them sleeping and looking so peaceful.
My son and I have had lots of talks about her these past days, remembering all the cute things she used to do to make us laugh and smile, we've shared a few tears along the way, and both commented that she is in a better place now, no longer in pain and hopefully running around with both Brishc and Shadow.
I miss my little puppy so much and know that over time the memories won't make me cry but will hopefully turn to smiles as I feel her within my soul, letting me know that she might not be here with us physically but will always be a part of our lives.
Love you puppy dog..................................
My name is Marcus and part of me died when I held her as she left us.
I've had three really horrible days in my life.
The first came when I got the call on April 9th, 1998 that my mom had passed away.
The second happened on December 4th, 2009 and involved having a neurosurgeon advise me that the surgery he proposed to relieve cranial pressure on my son's brain due to a sinus infection had a 50/50 chance of saving his life or killing him.
The third was less than two weeks ago when I had to make the decision to let go of Moki and have her put under as she was in pain and there was no way I could let her suffer.
I've been struggling with that loss every single day, fighting back both my tears and anger at the oddest moments.
Moki had slowly been getting worse from her lymphoma but not to the extent that I thought we were even close to having to make that call, but something happened between the time I left for work on that Wednesday and the time I came home that put her over the tipping point.
We were told 2-6 months back in January and were given almost 3 months more to spend with her.
We tried to take her for as many walks in her park as we could and shared far more treats with her in these last few months than she'd ever had in the prior 7 years, including table scraps that made her tail wag with happiness.
She was the most wonderful puppy anyone could ever have asked for. She was kind, affectionate, caring, and empathetic.
Last year when I had my cancer scare and was off work for 2 months dealing with the adverse reaction to the chemo I was given post-surgery, that pupper never left my side, always snuggling with me to let me know she loved me and had my back.
Over the last two week's I've received so many reminders about her from little things around the house to memory tickler from FaceBook of a picture, I had taken of her back in 2015 curled up in Corinna's lap, both of them sleeping and looking so peaceful.
My son and I have had lots of talks about her these past days, remembering all the cute things she used to do to make us laugh and smile, we've shared a few tears along the way, and both commented that she is in a better place now, no longer in pain and hopefully running around with both Brishc and Shadow.
I miss my little puppy so much and know that over time the memories won't make me cry but will hopefully turn to smiles as I feel her within my soul, letting me know that she might not be here with us physically but will always be a part of our lives.
Love you puppy dog..................................
My name is Marcus and part of me died when I held her as she left us.
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