When did courtesy and respect go out of fashion?

Musical recommendation - True Love by Pink featuring Lily Allen

July 14/13 Sunday

I was going to write about my take on the movie "Rock of Ages" that I had pvr'd during the week but observed something tonight as I was watering my lawn that changed all of that.

Now given how much I love movies, music, and books you can just imagine what is on the horizon when I can combine any two of these things into a posting, and that it must be something large, least ways to me, to make me change my topic.

Actually it wasn't really one thing but a couple of things I observed today that made me take a moment to reflect on how poorer we are as a society these days, poorer in terms of the simple basic courtesies and respect we pay to one another. I'll go one farther and say we are much poorer when you apply those concepts to the world of dating and relationships.

This is my solo weekend as my son started his week with his mom on Friday so I've been busy golfing and doing the errands and chores I usually put on the back burner when he is with me. I slept in really late, really late for me and Moki the Wonder Puppy that is, and had only been awake for about 8 minutes when I got a text from my daughter asking me what I was up to today, I replied that I didn't have anything going on as I was still recovering from playing 36 holes of golf yesterday, she asked me if I wanted to meet her and my son at the movies and we made plans to see a 4:30 show.

I used the time to clean up and left a bit early to return a remote I was told I needed for the Apple TV I purchased on Friday, turns out contrary to what the sales guy thought he knew the remote is included, and it was as I was entering Best Buy that I noticed a couple walking side by side up to the sliding door and as it started to open he pushed in front of her so he could enter first. I wish he could have seen the look on his girlfriends face as it wasn't one of love, something tells me this is a pretty normal occurrence with him and might be something he is going to regret, hopefully sooner rather than later.

The second incident happened after I got home and decided to water the front lawn before grilling up a nice steak for dinner.  So here I am watering the front yard and thinking to myself I've really got to get the cedar bush dug up that rests between my house and my neighbour S (we each own half of a duplex and the bush was there from prior owners and we both hate it) when a black Chrysler 300 pulls into her driveway and just sits there. Now at first I thought it was her ex coming to pick up her kids but it dawned on me that the guy sitting in it wasn't her ex and he was actually texting someone. A few minutes pass with me watering the grass and him glancing my way now and again when it hit me he was there to pick Sara up for a date and it was her he'd been texting.

I stood there thinking to myself what a complete lazy fucking ass this guy was for not even bothering to get out of his car to walk to the door and actually pick her up like a gentleman. After a bit she came out and still loser didn't even bother to open her door for her, seeing me she waved hello and opened the door herself, as he backed out of the driveway the guy shot me a scowl as if I'd done something wrong, that tempted me to text her that she really needed to do some better shopping when it comes to men given the total lack of respect this one showed her but I refrained as one never knows if it might make a bad situation worse.

Now before your minds start wandering around thinking why do I have her cell number or that I should be trying to date her just take a moment to pause. We are neighbours so that violates one of my dating rules and the reason I have her cell is twofold - first being when I moved in I managed to lock myself out of my house the first time I brought stuff over and with my cell battery being low she gave me her number to give the locksmith in case mine died and the second is because we are neighbours and have been trying to coordinate getting the roof redone and working on getting quotes.

I wonder if she even realizes how rude and inconsiderate his actions were?  I wonder how she would react if her own daughter was shown the same lack of courtesy when a boy comes to pick her up for a date? That day isn't far off as her daughter is a year older than my son and he has already gone out to the movies with a girlfriend, granted his mom or I have driven him and he's met the girl at the theatre but in a few years he'll be driving and odds are her daughter will get asked out by a guy who does drive in the not too distant future.

What makes a person think they can just show up and send a text to get you to come outside?

What makes a person put up with it?  I know dating as an adult is really difficult but I don't think it is so bad that I'd ever be willing to put up with that kind of behaviour from a date.

I remember when my daughter was 16 and a date came to get her and as he pulled into the driveway he honked his horn to let her know he was there. I walked to the door and signalled my ex to intercept our daughter as she was coming down the stairs and send her to her room until I called for her, I went out to the car and knocked on his driver side window and asked him how bad was his injury, needless to say he looked at me with the stupidest look on his face and said he wasn't injured. I leaned down and rested my arms on the door frame and said these exact words "I'm sorry, I just figured you had to be hurt in order not to actually move your fucking ass out of this car and come to the door and meet the parents of the young lady you are taking out" and with that I opened his door for him and walked into the house. He followed me and as I closed the door I motioned he should either ring the doorbell or knock on the door.  After a moment of what must involved about 200K of  mental calculations on his part, the mental giant figured it out and rang the bell. My ex opened it and he introduced himself and asked if our daughter was ready for their date. I called her down and received the look of death from her for embarassing her in such a way, her mother saw the look and told her to knock it off and they'd have a little mother daughter chat later about why I did what I did. Her little brother came down after she left and went to high five me when I just looked at him with that look that can make him freeze mid action and told him he better never act the same way that young man did when he dates. He smiled at his mom and I and said he'd been raised better than that, pretty strong words to hear from a six year old back in 2005 to say the least.

So what is your take - is my age showing or have you noticed that people are just less courteous to one another these days?

What would you have done in my place?