Mexico Blog is Pending.......

Saturday, January 27/18

Apologies on not getting the promised entry about my week in Mexico posted last weekend but I had some stuff come up that sort of derailed me mentally.

Turns out I had forgotten to take my phone off of airplane mode and didn't notice it till Sunday, once I corrected that I had some messages in my voicemail that I had to process.

First one, and the big one, was a call from my doctor telling me I had an appointment booked with the oncology department at the QCH to review my situation.  The kicker to this is that I haven't even had my surgery yet and we still have no clue if my tumor is benign or malignant. This sort of got cleared up when I checked my mail box and found some documents from the doctor that outlined my condition, possible course of treatment, and post surgical recovery. I knew going in that I was having surgery no matter what my upcoming CT scan shows and now it appears that they are planning on flooding my system with one of two drugs (BCG or Mitomycin) during the surgery before they even get the results of the biopsy back, guess this is one of those offensive defensive measures they are taking.

My week of peace and relaxation came to crashing halt with that voicemail, as you can imagine.

Not the most reassuring fact to process about seeing oncology before even having surgery but it does go along with my revised approach to this whole mess..........I was going on the best possible outcome of each stage so far and each time I've been bent over and royally fucked so now I'm taking the extreme position that I have the big C and thus nothing they tell me can shock me or make me upset.

Now don't think that means I've given up, far from it my friends, you are my friends right? lol.

No, now it just means I won't let myself get down when something untoward happens and can focus on beating the shit out of this and looking forward to celebrating when I win!!!  I know exactly what I'm doing when that happens........Iberostar Playa Mita!!!!!!

The other message I got that wasn't all that expected came on Tuesday when I was working from home due to the bad freezing rain we were experiencing.

Another call from my doctors office telling me I now have a surgical date booked for early March. Well her exact words were "tentative surgical date". After she outlined what was going to happen I asked what she meant by tentative as she had used that work every time she mentioned the surgery.

Her response was that it is tentative pending the result of my CT scan and not finding anything else, like more tumors in other parts of my body. They have another earlier date sort of penciled off in case the CT scan doesn't come back favourable to me. So based on my new approach I'm expecting it to happen end of February now.

That means more tumors but it also means I just get to kick some ass earlier!!!!

Along the way I've reached the decision that it is now time to sit down with my kids and tell them what is going on as I'm finding it almost as stressful keeping this hidden as I am in dealing with the ramifications to my own health. I talked this over with my ex and she agrees the time is right now that the wedding has passed and exams are over for my son.

I've made arrangements to have dinner at my daughters on Sunday and that is going to be when we sit down and talk about this. My daughter senses something is up as she has already texted her mom to ask what's going on with me and my son has been texting me more than usual this week.

I told my ex she can probably expect our daughter to call her Sunday night and probably the son as well and she said definitely the daughter will but the son will probably keep his feelings close to the vest, similar to how his father handles things. I think what is going to happen with him is that he's going to realize around 8-9pm that I've not been open and honest with him about things and than the proverbial shit is going to hit the fan at my place when he lets loose with some serious anger, well deserved as I have been lying to him but in my defense they've been lies of omission and not commission.

So now you are all up to date on the situation. Fingers crossed and wish me well tomorrow.

Marcus

P.S. I still owe you the entry about my week down Mexico way and promise to get it completed and posted in the next couple of days.