Wednesday, October 30/19
I'm all about continually pushing myself to learn new things, to stretch my boundaries, to keep looking outwards to see what life has to offer me.
Normally the things I learn are pretty cool and interesting, at least to me that is.
Rarely do I come away thinking it was a bad experience, at the very least I can add it to the trunkful of useless trivia I've stored over the years that make me the best Trivial Pursuit partner one could ever wish for, I kid thee not my friends.
All of that came to a crashing halt yesterday when I logged into my dating profile and found a message from someone.
Seems pretty innocent enough right? You'd be right for thinking that up until I got to the end of the message and was told that though her profile lists her as single, the truth is that she is in a polyamorous relationship and wanted to meet me to see if I'd be interested in pursuing things with her.
Now to be fair, and I do try to be fair as often as possible, I knew I wasn't really too interested in meeting as she had far too many pictures of her cat and all of the pictures of herself were with sunglasses, a huge red flag for me as I know I've stated in previous posts that I think eyes are one of the first things I notice about a person, especially a woman.
Now I'd never heard this phrase polyamorous used before and she didn't provide any context of what it meant, assuming I guess that I knew what it was all about, which I didn't, until now.
Here is one definition of what it means.....
First off, it's an adjective (makes sense to me so far)
"Characterized by or involved in the practice of engaging in multiple sexual relationships with the consent of all the people involved. Intimacy and trust are essential to a successful polyamorous relationship"
My first thought? What the Fuck!
Now I may be in my mid-fifties, but I'd like to think I'm pretty damn open-minded about things and have seen a lot of changes in my life all these long years.
My take is that this is just an easy way to make one feel good about basically cheating on your partner, and I don't give a damn if it's done with their knowledge and permission, when you take a vow that vow should mean something, it is not to be put aside by mutual consent so one of you can get a taste of something, really someone, new.
Back in the day, a phrase I never thought I'd be using but here it is, this was called something entirely different......swinging
If I had to venture why there's been an evolution in the name it's probably because swinging implied a couple were there at the same time doing it together, whereas, with a polyamorous relationship, each partner seeks out someone on his or her own, just letting the other partner know what is going on, bringing everything into the light and not hiding anything. I guess this alleviates any need to feel guilty for doing the deed, also known as the beast with two backs, with someone who is not legally your partner.
Maybe it helps those who get bored easily and aren't willing to see the potential of just one partner.
I'm sure this is good for those people but I know it's certainly not my cup of tea, I'm all about the one on one and think open communications are all that is needed to keep a relationship fresh, vibrant and fulfilling.
Of course, you could ask what do I know, I've been single since late 2015 when I managed to crash and burn with Corinna. I know this, though we were in a medium distance relationship, not one moment did I ever think of being anything other than true to her, not because I feared the consequences but because that was what she deserved, that was what I deserved, and I could never hurt someone like that, I'd sooner walk away than cheat on my partner.
So you'd be on safe ground to think this guy will never be part of anything other than a true one on one relationship. I'll stay single till my last breath before I'll break that vow.
Actions have meaning and words mean something when said from the heart. I've only told three women I love them in my life, well three in a romantic manner. Maybe that number increases by one should things work out for me going forward but if it doesn't, I'll be okay as the three that did hear it meant something to me, something deep and meaningful for different periods of my life.
My name is Marcus and I think it's high time I start writing entries to my blog.
These are my continuing adventures in trying to be a good father, grandfather, friend, coworker, mastering the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, and fan of the Oxford comma. Did you see what I just did there? lol
Comments, questions, and critiques are always welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Tonight's musical suggestion is "Champion" by Bishop Briggs
Wednesday, October 30, 2019
Wednesday, October 16, 2019
A Belated Happy Thanksgiving
Wednesday, October 16/19
So last Monday was Thanksgiving in Canada and for the first time in a very long time, I did not prepare a post about the holiday.
Well to be fair, I haven't really prepared many posts in the past couple of months.
I'd like to rectify this omission and say I hope everyone had a wonderful long weekend, I know I did.
What made my weekend so wonderful you ask?
It was filled with family and friends, nothing beats that in my books.
I spent Saturday morning with my daughter and grandson at a pumpkin patch, where we took a tractor ride through corn stalks to hand-pick pumpkins, Jack chose all three and made me laugh so much I was almost in tears. Saturday afternoon was spent sitting on the dirt driveway at my daughter's place helping Jack fill imaginary pot-holes. Yes, you read that correctly, I sat in the dirt and helped my grandson move pebbles around to even out the laneway. Best couple of hours I've spent in a long time. When nap time came around I was told that only poppa could snuggle him as he fell asleep. You could have seen my smile from outer space.
Sunday was the family dinner hosted at my daughter's place. She has an open concept main floor that really works well for large gatherings, there were 15 people all told between family and friends. My ex made the turkey and ham, while my daughter did the side dishes. One added bonus was the extra sugar pie my ex made just for me :)
After dinner, we did something very Canadian and all sat around the fire pit and enjoyed each other's company. I got to talk to my son about how his classes were going and we somehow managed to discuss soccer as well, you'd almost think our family was into the sport or something.
Monday was all about cleaning up the disaster that had become my home office and getting my laptop set up with the two external monitors, my desktop system has been acting up for the past few months and I'd finally had enough.
Of course, once I finished with the office task I headed out to play some golf. It was almost perfect weather and my home course was pretty much empty.
Must have been something in the water as I played lights out for most of the round, bagging a birdie and leaving 4 others just out of reach, I was hitting both my driver and 3 wood perfectly all day. The only dark spot on the game was my putting, I just couldn't manage to read the speed of the greens and 3 putted my way into a 92, a score that easily could have been an 84 or 85!!!
All in all, one of the better weekends I've had in the last several months.
But it did offer me ample time to reflect on the things I am thankful for in my life.
I'm thankful for my health. After the cancer scare last year and this year's little left knee injury I'm happy to still be able to do most of what I like physically. I had my one-year followup last month and things were perfect so the world is my oyster :)
I'm thankful for my family and all the love and joy they bring my way. My kids are my biggest accomplishment and now I can add my grandson to the mix as well. Next year we'll be welcoming a little girl into the fold and I can't wait to lose my heart to her.
I'm thankful for my job and all the variety it brings me day in and day out. Sure there are times it can be stressful with being pulled in multiple directions at once but this same time last year I was contemplating changing jobs as I was totally bored where I was, so onward and upward.
I'm thankful for pushing myself to get out of my comfort zone when it comes to socializing. I've made new friends at work, been out to lunches, and even committed to forming a foursome for our work golf tournament last month. We didn't win, weren't even close, but oh man did we have a blast on the course and at the banquet afterwards, so much so that we are already talking about doing it again next year!!!!!
I'm thankful for eight amazing years with Moki. She gave me strength when I thought the future looked bleak, was always up for a walk or a snuggle, and loved her human with all her heart. I miss that pupper every single day.
Life doesn't always turn out the way we imagine, but that doesn't mean it won't offer ample opportunities to grow as a person and enjoy yourself along the way.
I'm thankful that I have the ability to love and be loved.
My name is Marcus and these are my continuing adventures through life as I try and master the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, be a good father and grandfather, and just maybe, find love once more in my life.
Comments, questions, and even criticisms are welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Today's musical suggestion comes from The Arkells in "Hand Me Downs"
So last Monday was Thanksgiving in Canada and for the first time in a very long time, I did not prepare a post about the holiday.
Well to be fair, I haven't really prepared many posts in the past couple of months.
I'd like to rectify this omission and say I hope everyone had a wonderful long weekend, I know I did.
What made my weekend so wonderful you ask?
It was filled with family and friends, nothing beats that in my books.
I spent Saturday morning with my daughter and grandson at a pumpkin patch, where we took a tractor ride through corn stalks to hand-pick pumpkins, Jack chose all three and made me laugh so much I was almost in tears. Saturday afternoon was spent sitting on the dirt driveway at my daughter's place helping Jack fill imaginary pot-holes. Yes, you read that correctly, I sat in the dirt and helped my grandson move pebbles around to even out the laneway. Best couple of hours I've spent in a long time. When nap time came around I was told that only poppa could snuggle him as he fell asleep. You could have seen my smile from outer space.
Sunday was the family dinner hosted at my daughter's place. She has an open concept main floor that really works well for large gatherings, there were 15 people all told between family and friends. My ex made the turkey and ham, while my daughter did the side dishes. One added bonus was the extra sugar pie my ex made just for me :)
After dinner, we did something very Canadian and all sat around the fire pit and enjoyed each other's company. I got to talk to my son about how his classes were going and we somehow managed to discuss soccer as well, you'd almost think our family was into the sport or something.
Monday was all about cleaning up the disaster that had become my home office and getting my laptop set up with the two external monitors, my desktop system has been acting up for the past few months and I'd finally had enough.
Of course, once I finished with the office task I headed out to play some golf. It was almost perfect weather and my home course was pretty much empty.
Must have been something in the water as I played lights out for most of the round, bagging a birdie and leaving 4 others just out of reach, I was hitting both my driver and 3 wood perfectly all day. The only dark spot on the game was my putting, I just couldn't manage to read the speed of the greens and 3 putted my way into a 92, a score that easily could have been an 84 or 85!!!
All in all, one of the better weekends I've had in the last several months.
But it did offer me ample time to reflect on the things I am thankful for in my life.
I'm thankful for my health. After the cancer scare last year and this year's little left knee injury I'm happy to still be able to do most of what I like physically. I had my one-year followup last month and things were perfect so the world is my oyster :)
I'm thankful for my family and all the love and joy they bring my way. My kids are my biggest accomplishment and now I can add my grandson to the mix as well. Next year we'll be welcoming a little girl into the fold and I can't wait to lose my heart to her.
I'm thankful for my job and all the variety it brings me day in and day out. Sure there are times it can be stressful with being pulled in multiple directions at once but this same time last year I was contemplating changing jobs as I was totally bored where I was, so onward and upward.
I'm thankful for pushing myself to get out of my comfort zone when it comes to socializing. I've made new friends at work, been out to lunches, and even committed to forming a foursome for our work golf tournament last month. We didn't win, weren't even close, but oh man did we have a blast on the course and at the banquet afterwards, so much so that we are already talking about doing it again next year!!!!!
I'm thankful for eight amazing years with Moki. She gave me strength when I thought the future looked bleak, was always up for a walk or a snuggle, and loved her human with all her heart. I miss that pupper every single day.
Life doesn't always turn out the way we imagine, but that doesn't mean it won't offer ample opportunities to grow as a person and enjoy yourself along the way.
I'm thankful that I have the ability to love and be loved.
My name is Marcus and these are my continuing adventures through life as I try and master the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards, be a good father and grandfather, and just maybe, find love once more in my life.
Comments, questions, and even criticisms are welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Today's musical suggestion comes from The Arkells in "Hand Me Downs"
Tuesday, October 1, 2019
Moki...........
Tuesday, October 1st, 2019
I've had three really horrible days in my life.
The first came when I got the call on April 9th, 1998 that my mom had passed away.
The second happened on December 4th, 2009 and involved having a neurosurgeon advise me that the surgery he proposed to relieve cranial pressure on my son's brain due to a sinus infection had a 50/50 chance of saving his life or killing him.
The third was less than two weeks ago when I had to make the decision to let go of Moki and have her put under as she was in pain and there was no way I could let her suffer.
I've been struggling with that loss every single day, fighting back both my tears and anger at the oddest moments.
Moki had slowly been getting worse from her lymphoma but not to the extent that I thought we were even close to having to make that call, but something happened between the time I left for work on that Wednesday and the time I came home that put her over the tipping point.
We were told 2-6 months back in January and were given almost 3 months more to spend with her.
We tried to take her for as many walks in her park as we could and shared far more treats with her in these last few months than she'd ever had in the prior 7 years, including table scraps that made her tail wag with happiness.
She was the most wonderful puppy anyone could ever have asked for. She was kind, affectionate, caring, and empathetic.
Last year when I had my cancer scare and was off work for 2 months dealing with the adverse reaction to the chemo I was given post-surgery, that pupper never left my side, always snuggling with me to let me know she loved me and had my back.
Over the last two week's I've received so many reminders about her from little things around the house to memory tickler from FaceBook of a picture, I had taken of her back in 2015 curled up in Corinna's lap, both of them sleeping and looking so peaceful.
My son and I have had lots of talks about her these past days, remembering all the cute things she used to do to make us laugh and smile, we've shared a few tears along the way, and both commented that she is in a better place now, no longer in pain and hopefully running around with both Brishc and Shadow.
I miss my little puppy so much and know that over time the memories won't make me cry but will hopefully turn to smiles as I feel her within my soul, letting me know that she might not be here with us physically but will always be a part of our lives.
Love you puppy dog..................................
My name is Marcus and part of me died when I held her as she left us.
I've had three really horrible days in my life.
The first came when I got the call on April 9th, 1998 that my mom had passed away.
The second happened on December 4th, 2009 and involved having a neurosurgeon advise me that the surgery he proposed to relieve cranial pressure on my son's brain due to a sinus infection had a 50/50 chance of saving his life or killing him.
The third was less than two weeks ago when I had to make the decision to let go of Moki and have her put under as she was in pain and there was no way I could let her suffer.
I've been struggling with that loss every single day, fighting back both my tears and anger at the oddest moments.
Moki had slowly been getting worse from her lymphoma but not to the extent that I thought we were even close to having to make that call, but something happened between the time I left for work on that Wednesday and the time I came home that put her over the tipping point.
We were told 2-6 months back in January and were given almost 3 months more to spend with her.
We tried to take her for as many walks in her park as we could and shared far more treats with her in these last few months than she'd ever had in the prior 7 years, including table scraps that made her tail wag with happiness.
She was the most wonderful puppy anyone could ever have asked for. She was kind, affectionate, caring, and empathetic.
Last year when I had my cancer scare and was off work for 2 months dealing with the adverse reaction to the chemo I was given post-surgery, that pupper never left my side, always snuggling with me to let me know she loved me and had my back.
Over the last two week's I've received so many reminders about her from little things around the house to memory tickler from FaceBook of a picture, I had taken of her back in 2015 curled up in Corinna's lap, both of them sleeping and looking so peaceful.
My son and I have had lots of talks about her these past days, remembering all the cute things she used to do to make us laugh and smile, we've shared a few tears along the way, and both commented that she is in a better place now, no longer in pain and hopefully running around with both Brishc and Shadow.
I miss my little puppy so much and know that over time the memories won't make me cry but will hopefully turn to smiles as I feel her within my soul, letting me know that she might not be here with us physically but will always be a part of our lives.
Love you puppy dog..................................
My name is Marcus and part of me died when I held her as she left us.
Sunday, August 4, 2019
Salford City Football Club....am I really a traitor?
Friday, August 02/19
So while my son was getting ready for work this morning and I was being lazy given its day one of my four-day weekend, I was checking out the upcoming soccer season and pending transfers while sitting at the breakfast nook eating some oatmeal.
My son happened to see the web browser was open to the Salford City Football Club website and he commented that he couldn't believe I was actually following them.
I laughed and said my ultimate dream, soccer wise, these days was to see Salford City continue to get promoted to the Premier League and get to actually host Manchester United Football Club (MUFC) at a home game that is literally insight of Old Trafford.
Salford City has been promoted something like 4 straight seasons and now is playing in the upper echelons of English football. I learned about them from a Netflix special called "The Class of '92" that showcased the investment into the club by five, and now six, members of the group of players called the "Class of '92" who would go on to make Manchester United a dominant team, including winning a Treble in 1999.
The original group included Phil and Gary Neville, Nicky Butts, Paul Scholes, and Ryan Giggs. They increased to majority ownership with the later addition of David Beckham.
I made the comment to my son last year when MUFC was taking its sweet time in making Ole Gunnar Solskjaer the permanent replacement for Jose Mourinho that if they didn't make it happen I'd switch allegiance to Salford City. He had no clue who they were and I had the pleasure of telling him the story and see his own enjoyment in the success they've had show up in his smile.
Of course, he doubted my threat as he knows I'm a Red Devil through and through, no matter what, and he's right, but it doesn't mean there isn't room in my cold heart to support a plucky underdog like Salford City.
It dawned on me that I've actually been checking up on them to see what steps they are taking to strengthen the roster in anticipation of this coming League 2 season opener against Stevenage more than I have on MUFC's attempts to get back to the top of the Premier League.
Has my allegiance changed so much? No, I don't think so, maybe my current interest is on Salford City as the League 2 season kicks off tomorrow and it's logical that I'd be more focused on them at the moment since MUFC is still playing exhibition games for the moment.
But it might be telling that I've been contemplating buying myself a Salford City away shirt to show my support for the "Ammies", not a thought that has been front and centre where Manchester United has been concerned lately.
My name is Marcus and while most of my posts are around living my life the best I can, being the best father possible to my daughter and son, improving my golf game as much as possible, and finding the one and only imperfectly perfect woman for me, some also stray outside these lines and might involve just about any topic under the sun, like being teased by said son about being a traitor to my club lol.
Just so everyone is clear on where my allegiances lay.....Manchester United, FC Bayern Munchen, and Salford City Football Club. In that order and always in that order!
Questions and comments are always welcome and I have a very impressive response rate of almost 96.9753% as of last week. ooasm2018@gmail.com
So while my son was getting ready for work this morning and I was being lazy given its day one of my four-day weekend, I was checking out the upcoming soccer season and pending transfers while sitting at the breakfast nook eating some oatmeal.
My son happened to see the web browser was open to the Salford City Football Club website and he commented that he couldn't believe I was actually following them.
I laughed and said my ultimate dream, soccer wise, these days was to see Salford City continue to get promoted to the Premier League and get to actually host Manchester United Football Club (MUFC) at a home game that is literally insight of Old Trafford.
Salford City has been promoted something like 4 straight seasons and now is playing in the upper echelons of English football. I learned about them from a Netflix special called "The Class of '92" that showcased the investment into the club by five, and now six, members of the group of players called the "Class of '92" who would go on to make Manchester United a dominant team, including winning a Treble in 1999.
The original group included Phil and Gary Neville, Nicky Butts, Paul Scholes, and Ryan Giggs. They increased to majority ownership with the later addition of David Beckham.
I made the comment to my son last year when MUFC was taking its sweet time in making Ole Gunnar Solskjaer the permanent replacement for Jose Mourinho that if they didn't make it happen I'd switch allegiance to Salford City. He had no clue who they were and I had the pleasure of telling him the story and see his own enjoyment in the success they've had show up in his smile.
Of course, he doubted my threat as he knows I'm a Red Devil through and through, no matter what, and he's right, but it doesn't mean there isn't room in my cold heart to support a plucky underdog like Salford City.
It dawned on me that I've actually been checking up on them to see what steps they are taking to strengthen the roster in anticipation of this coming League 2 season opener against Stevenage more than I have on MUFC's attempts to get back to the top of the Premier League.
Has my allegiance changed so much? No, I don't think so, maybe my current interest is on Salford City as the League 2 season kicks off tomorrow and it's logical that I'd be more focused on them at the moment since MUFC is still playing exhibition games for the moment.
But it might be telling that I've been contemplating buying myself a Salford City away shirt to show my support for the "Ammies", not a thought that has been front and centre where Manchester United has been concerned lately.
My name is Marcus and while most of my posts are around living my life the best I can, being the best father possible to my daughter and son, improving my golf game as much as possible, and finding the one and only imperfectly perfect woman for me, some also stray outside these lines and might involve just about any topic under the sun, like being teased by said son about being a traitor to my club lol.
Just so everyone is clear on where my allegiances lay.....Manchester United, FC Bayern Munchen, and Salford City Football Club. In that order and always in that order!
Questions and comments are always welcome and I have a very impressive response rate of almost 96.9753% as of last week. ooasm2018@gmail.com
GO AMMIES!!!!
My Four Day Weekend
Thursday, August 01/19
So this coming weekend is the long Civic Weekend in Ontario so while some may be enjoying a three day weekend I've decided to one-up everyone and make mine a four day weekend by also taking off Friday :)
So what big plans are filling up my four days?
If you thought of golf right off the bat than kudos to you for having paid attention to prior blog entries.
Normally these kinds of weekends involve my kids in some way but they've both already got plans for the weekend. My son begins his week with his mom tomorrow and my daughter is going camping with her own family and her husband's brother and family down near Sandbanks Provincial Park. Can't wait to see the pictures of Jack rolling down the dunes into the lake :)
Friday will see me running a few errands before enjoying an easy round in the afternoon at Stittsville.
I've lined up a 7:07 tee time at Club de Golf Champlain over in Gatineau and will follow it up with another afternoon round at Stittsville. Me golfing in Gatineau? I know, I find it as shocking as you do given some of the comments I've made about Separatists and Quebec, but fair is fair and I'm the first to admit that does Quebec not only have some good courses but eye-catching gorgeous women as well :)
Sunday.....yes, another round of golf at my club but I'm also planning on some serious deck time with a cold beverage, a good book, and Moki.
Monday is kind of open at the moment. I'm debating playing a new course and at the same time thinking a nice walk along the canal from Dows Lake to the Byward Market and back might be something I'd enjoy just as much.
Somewhere along the way I've got to login to the network and run some reports as I've got a really busy day on Tuesday with some critical reconciliations due for review by the controller and new director of accounting so we can finish off our required quarterly SEC statements.
So my weekend is looking pretty good but it could be so much better if I had that someone special to share the moments with.....
My name is Marcus and these are my continuing adventures in being a parent, co-worker, friend, attempts to master the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards out, and finding that one imperfectly perfect woman who makes me feel butterflies and go blind to every other woman around me.
Today's musical suggestion is "Pontoon" by Little Big Town. The perfect long weekend summer song in my mind.
Questions and comments can be directed my way at ooasm2018@gmail.com and there's a 96.5% chance you'll get a response :)
So this coming weekend is the long Civic Weekend in Ontario so while some may be enjoying a three day weekend I've decided to one-up everyone and make mine a four day weekend by also taking off Friday :)
So what big plans are filling up my four days?
If you thought of golf right off the bat than kudos to you for having paid attention to prior blog entries.
Normally these kinds of weekends involve my kids in some way but they've both already got plans for the weekend. My son begins his week with his mom tomorrow and my daughter is going camping with her own family and her husband's brother and family down near Sandbanks Provincial Park. Can't wait to see the pictures of Jack rolling down the dunes into the lake :)
Friday will see me running a few errands before enjoying an easy round in the afternoon at Stittsville.
I've lined up a 7:07 tee time at Club de Golf Champlain over in Gatineau and will follow it up with another afternoon round at Stittsville. Me golfing in Gatineau? I know, I find it as shocking as you do given some of the comments I've made about Separatists and Quebec, but fair is fair and I'm the first to admit that does Quebec not only have some good courses but eye-catching gorgeous women as well :)
Sunday.....yes, another round of golf at my club but I'm also planning on some serious deck time with a cold beverage, a good book, and Moki.
Monday is kind of open at the moment. I'm debating playing a new course and at the same time thinking a nice walk along the canal from Dows Lake to the Byward Market and back might be something I'd enjoy just as much.
Somewhere along the way I've got to login to the network and run some reports as I've got a really busy day on Tuesday with some critical reconciliations due for review by the controller and new director of accounting so we can finish off our required quarterly SEC statements.
So my weekend is looking pretty good but it could be so much better if I had that someone special to share the moments with.....
My name is Marcus and these are my continuing adventures in being a parent, co-worker, friend, attempts to master the perfect 8 iron from 130 yards out, and finding that one imperfectly perfect woman who makes me feel butterflies and go blind to every other woman around me.
Today's musical suggestion is "Pontoon" by Little Big Town. The perfect long weekend summer song in my mind.
Questions and comments can be directed my way at ooasm2018@gmail.com and there's a 96.5% chance you'll get a response :)
Wednesday, July 10, 2019
Simple Rules for Life
Wednesday, July 10/19
So I follow a few people and sports teams on Instagram and saw the following this afternoon on Kate Quigley's profile and thought I'd share it with you.....
We only have one life. Keep it simple.
My name is Marcus and I'm going to start incorporating these into my daily life. Probably not going to help me find my one but probably aren't going to hurt my chances either so it's all good.
Today's musical suggestion is "No Roots" by Alice Merton
Got a question or comment? Let me know at ooasm2018@gmail.com
So I follow a few people and sports teams on Instagram and saw the following this afternoon on Kate Quigley's profile and thought I'd share it with you.....
We only have one life. Keep it simple.
- missing someone - call them
- wanna meet up - invite them
- wanna be understood - explain yourself
- have questions - ask
- don't like something - speak up
- don't like someone - don't spend time with them
- like something - share it
- want something - ask for it
- like someone - make an effort
- love someone - tell them or better yet show them
My name is Marcus and I'm going to start incorporating these into my daily life. Probably not going to help me find my one but probably aren't going to hurt my chances either so it's all good.
Today's musical suggestion is "No Roots" by Alice Merton
Got a question or comment? Let me know at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Monday, July 8, 2019
I am Broken
Monday, July 08/19
So on my way to play golf at The Mississippi Golf Club on Saturday, I heard a song on the radio that made me take pause and think about the lyrics and what they meant to me.........
The song? Broken by Lonely the Band.
It's an interesting song and I highly suggest giving it a listen to see if it resonates with you like it did, actually does, with me.
I've posted recently that I'm struggling with things and nothing has changed about that statement, I am struggling but I know that I am and that is half the battle when trying to push through to the other side and see the light once again.
I've had a few messages from followers expressing some concern and offering to meet for a drink and chat, offers I appreciate, but please rest assured there is no chance I'll ever do anything to harm myself as I know that doing so would not make me feel better and actually hurt those around me far more than I am feeling right now.
So what do I mean by broken?
We are all broken at some point or another in our lives. Maybe our spirit has been broken over time, maybe we are physically breaking down, maybe our relationship is showing some chinks, maybe we have doubts spiritually, or maybe everything is showing the normal wear and tear of time that looked at alone doesn't seem too much but when taken together feels more than a little overwhelming.
I think it is the last that epitomizes my own state these days.
My spirit took a blow a few years ago that I didn't really see coming and has only recently started to recover from enough to let me contemplate moving forward in my search for love.
Physically, I'm more broken than I've ever been and that says quite a bit given how much into sports I was in my younger years, maybe it's those earlier activities that are coming back to haunt me now.
Emotionally I'd say I was far more broken than I thought when things imploded back in 2015. I was caught off guard when a decision was made unilaterally that had a huge impact on my life, a life I saw moving in one direction that wasn't shared in the least. Part of what left me reeling from that decision was that I never saw it coming, never realized things were so tenuous between us, that I was so unaware of the situation that I was playing in left field all by myself.
That simple feeling of being so unaware did a number on my self-confidence, to such an extent that I basically shut down all external relationships and just stopped trying, living behind my false front that being single wasn't a bad thing and I didn't mind doing things on my own.
Well, I've come to realize that has to be the biggest fucking lie I've ever told myself.
I don't want to be alone nor do things by myself if I don't have to.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to deny myself a nice meal at Baton Rouge or go and skip seeing a movie solo just because I'm single and don't have anyone to do these with, but it would sure be nice to do them with another person.
When my marriage ended in 2007 I sort of dated someone almost right off the bat before realizing I wasn't really ready to make any commitments and ended things to start the healing process. It was about a year later that I entered the dating pool once again, confident that I was happy with myself and could actually put myself out there once again.
With Corinne, it feels like only now, almost 4 years later, that I'm in that same place where I'm starting to feel that sense of "Joie De Vivre" in regards to meeting people.
Kind of strange that it only took me a little over a year to overcome the end of a thirteen-year relationship and almost four years to get over one that really only had a one-year life span.
Wonder what that really says about the depth of my feelings for the two parties involved.
When you are broken you can do one of two things - continue on without any attempts to change things or fix the problems so you an opportunity to be happy.
I am broken......for now
I have healed my broken heart and it grows stronger every day, strong enough to risk it once more in my search for my one.
I have decided that I'm not going to stand on the sidelines anymore, my place is in the great arena we call dating.
Seeing how much I love golf I thought it appropriate to incorporate a golf term into today's post, Moving Day. It refers to the 3rd day, usually Saturday, of a 4-day tournament when players start to make a move to position themselves to challenge for the win on Sunday.
Well, guess what? It's moving day for me people in regards to finding love.
My name is Marcus and for far too long I've wallowed in self-pity over a decision I had no say in, it's time to take back control over my life and hopefully, someone will see me as the catch I think I am.
You can reach me at ooasm2018@gmail.com should the desire strike :)
So on my way to play golf at The Mississippi Golf Club on Saturday, I heard a song on the radio that made me take pause and think about the lyrics and what they meant to me.........
The song? Broken by Lonely the Band.
It's an interesting song and I highly suggest giving it a listen to see if it resonates with you like it did, actually does, with me.
I've posted recently that I'm struggling with things and nothing has changed about that statement, I am struggling but I know that I am and that is half the battle when trying to push through to the other side and see the light once again.
I've had a few messages from followers expressing some concern and offering to meet for a drink and chat, offers I appreciate, but please rest assured there is no chance I'll ever do anything to harm myself as I know that doing so would not make me feel better and actually hurt those around me far more than I am feeling right now.
So what do I mean by broken?
We are all broken at some point or another in our lives. Maybe our spirit has been broken over time, maybe we are physically breaking down, maybe our relationship is showing some chinks, maybe we have doubts spiritually, or maybe everything is showing the normal wear and tear of time that looked at alone doesn't seem too much but when taken together feels more than a little overwhelming.
I think it is the last that epitomizes my own state these days.
My spirit took a blow a few years ago that I didn't really see coming and has only recently started to recover from enough to let me contemplate moving forward in my search for love.
Physically, I'm more broken than I've ever been and that says quite a bit given how much into sports I was in my younger years, maybe it's those earlier activities that are coming back to haunt me now.
Emotionally I'd say I was far more broken than I thought when things imploded back in 2015. I was caught off guard when a decision was made unilaterally that had a huge impact on my life, a life I saw moving in one direction that wasn't shared in the least. Part of what left me reeling from that decision was that I never saw it coming, never realized things were so tenuous between us, that I was so unaware of the situation that I was playing in left field all by myself.
That simple feeling of being so unaware did a number on my self-confidence, to such an extent that I basically shut down all external relationships and just stopped trying, living behind my false front that being single wasn't a bad thing and I didn't mind doing things on my own.
Well, I've come to realize that has to be the biggest fucking lie I've ever told myself.
I don't want to be alone nor do things by myself if I don't have to.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to deny myself a nice meal at Baton Rouge or go and skip seeing a movie solo just because I'm single and don't have anyone to do these with, but it would sure be nice to do them with another person.
When my marriage ended in 2007 I sort of dated someone almost right off the bat before realizing I wasn't really ready to make any commitments and ended things to start the healing process. It was about a year later that I entered the dating pool once again, confident that I was happy with myself and could actually put myself out there once again.
With Corinne, it feels like only now, almost 4 years later, that I'm in that same place where I'm starting to feel that sense of "Joie De Vivre" in regards to meeting people.
Kind of strange that it only took me a little over a year to overcome the end of a thirteen-year relationship and almost four years to get over one that really only had a one-year life span.
Wonder what that really says about the depth of my feelings for the two parties involved.
When you are broken you can do one of two things - continue on without any attempts to change things or fix the problems so you an opportunity to be happy.
I am broken......for now
I have healed my broken heart and it grows stronger every day, strong enough to risk it once more in my search for my one.
I have decided that I'm not going to stand on the sidelines anymore, my place is in the great arena we call dating.
Seeing how much I love golf I thought it appropriate to incorporate a golf term into today's post, Moving Day. It refers to the 3rd day, usually Saturday, of a 4-day tournament when players start to make a move to position themselves to challenge for the win on Sunday.
Well, guess what? It's moving day for me people in regards to finding love.
My name is Marcus and for far too long I've wallowed in self-pity over a decision I had no say in, it's time to take back control over my life and hopefully, someone will see me as the catch I think I am.
You can reach me at ooasm2018@gmail.com should the desire strike :)
Thursday, July 4, 2019
For the first time I'm feeling my age
Wednesday, July 03/19
For the first time in my memory, I'm feeling my age and I have to say it sucks big time!
Over the course of the last month, I've somehow managed to develop tendonitis in my right shoulder that coupled with, as my doctor puts it, normal wear and tear have left me with severe pain whenever I do too much.
Added to that is the fact that two weeks ago it looks like I might have torn the MCL in my left knee from doing nothing more than walking a round of golf on a wet Saturday morning.
Of the two I'd say the knee has me way more bothered as every time I walk down some stairs or put any significant weight on it I hear and feel a clicking and popping sound and the knee feels like it wants to slide to the outside.
I'm scheduled to have x-rays done this Friday and then probably an MRI to see how bad it might be and the next course of action. Most likely surgery that might take anywhere from 6 to 9 months to get done, followed by what I'm guessing is going to be some serious rehab and physio to try and get back as much as I can in terms of mobility.
The shoulder sucks but I can physio that one back but the knee is worse as I've always worried about my knees from when I played high school football down in San Diego. My junior year saw 4 teammates blew out ACL's or MCL's that required the old style of surgery that cut through muscles and pretty much-ended football for my friends. I'm lucky in that my likely procedure will be done arthroscopically and mean minimal muscle damage. Sort of like my meniscus surgery back in 2009 from the ill-fated attempt to try my hand at snowboarding with the kids.
When it's all said and done I'll have had surgery on both knees for different reasons later in life than I thought would happen.
I'm sort of pissed off about it but I also know I'll get through it as I have a clear mind and open eyes as to my process.
Just wish my body hadn't decided to start reminding me I'm much older than I actually feel most days.
I see myself getting back into the gym and not just because it's where my rehab will start but also help me purge my body of negative chemicals and restore my mental harmony. Think there might also be some yoga added to my mix as one can never be too limber can one?
My name is Marcus and even though my body might be aging and getting older on me, I refuse to let my inner child be dampened and will continue to let him out to play, heck maybe he'll even help me meet my one........
Today's musical recommendation comes from the Cascadia album by Said The Whale in the song "Record Shop"........listening to it makes me think back when it was a big deal to visit Tower Records and buy a new album or two.
Comments and questions are always welcome so hit me up at my Gmail account - ooasm2018@gmail.com
For the first time in my memory, I'm feeling my age and I have to say it sucks big time!
Over the course of the last month, I've somehow managed to develop tendonitis in my right shoulder that coupled with, as my doctor puts it, normal wear and tear have left me with severe pain whenever I do too much.
Added to that is the fact that two weeks ago it looks like I might have torn the MCL in my left knee from doing nothing more than walking a round of golf on a wet Saturday morning.
Of the two I'd say the knee has me way more bothered as every time I walk down some stairs or put any significant weight on it I hear and feel a clicking and popping sound and the knee feels like it wants to slide to the outside.
I'm scheduled to have x-rays done this Friday and then probably an MRI to see how bad it might be and the next course of action. Most likely surgery that might take anywhere from 6 to 9 months to get done, followed by what I'm guessing is going to be some serious rehab and physio to try and get back as much as I can in terms of mobility.
The shoulder sucks but I can physio that one back but the knee is worse as I've always worried about my knees from when I played high school football down in San Diego. My junior year saw 4 teammates blew out ACL's or MCL's that required the old style of surgery that cut through muscles and pretty much-ended football for my friends. I'm lucky in that my likely procedure will be done arthroscopically and mean minimal muscle damage. Sort of like my meniscus surgery back in 2009 from the ill-fated attempt to try my hand at snowboarding with the kids.
When it's all said and done I'll have had surgery on both knees for different reasons later in life than I thought would happen.
I'm sort of pissed off about it but I also know I'll get through it as I have a clear mind and open eyes as to my process.
Just wish my body hadn't decided to start reminding me I'm much older than I actually feel most days.
I see myself getting back into the gym and not just because it's where my rehab will start but also help me purge my body of negative chemicals and restore my mental harmony. Think there might also be some yoga added to my mix as one can never be too limber can one?
My name is Marcus and even though my body might be aging and getting older on me, I refuse to let my inner child be dampened and will continue to let him out to play, heck maybe he'll even help me meet my one........
Today's musical recommendation comes from the Cascadia album by Said The Whale in the song "Record Shop"........listening to it makes me think back when it was a big deal to visit Tower Records and buy a new album or two.
Comments and questions are always welcome so hit me up at my Gmail account - ooasm2018@gmail.com
Monday, July 1, 2019
Happy Canada Day!!!
Monday, July 01/19
Happy Canada Day to all my fellow Canadians reading the blog.
Today we celebrate our 152nd birthday as a country and it's pretty damn awesome.
My weekend has been spent intermixed doing things with my son and playing golf. Both have been good and made me smile and laugh quite a bit.
My son will head over to his mom's this afternoon as she has to fly out to Toronto to deal with an acquisition and integration for her work and her fiance is on nights this week so he's going to be there for the next few days dealing with Miles, the other wonder puppy. When he leaves my place I'll head out to play my 4th and final round of the weekend :)
So what are you up to today? Celebrating with family and friends? Heading to Parliament Hill to take in the fireworks tonight? Kayaking at the lake? paddle boarding on the river? Soaking up some sunshine at the cottage?
All of those sound so Canadian eh?
Whatever you are doing I hope it's filled with lots of smiles, laughter, and enjoyment.
My name is Marcus and I'm a proud Canadian who happens to be looking for love and his last first kiss. Follow the blog to see what transpires as I try my luck at dating over the next few months.
Today's musical recommendation comes courtesy of DJ Noah on Live 88.5 in the form of "She's Kerosene" by The Interrupters. It's got a catchy little beat and I suggest you Google the band to see who the lead singer is, bet you'll be as surprised as I was :)
As always, comments and questions are welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Saturday, June 15, 2019
It's Been A Little While Since I Last Posted......
Saturday, June 15/19
So it's been more than a little while since I last posted and I've received a few messages asking me what the fuck is going on with me and if I'm alright (FYI that F bomb was verbatim from one of the messages so I don't think it is wrong to use it in this entry).
The honest truth is that I don't have a clue what's going on other than to admit I'm struggling big time with things and am really trying to get my shit together, with what appears to be and feels like little to no success so far.
I should be happy with the majority of my life right now as my health is good, other than some tendinitis in my right rotator cuff that is playing hell with my golf swing, work is going so well that I've not had one day where I wasn't involved with something new, my kids are doing really well, as is that little man Jack who owns me heart and soul.
But having said all of that I'm not myself and don't know how to snap out of it to get myself back to where I was happy with my life.
I took an internal vow when I started to write this blog that I wouldn't ever let my own moods become part of any entry and I've noticed my moodiness slipping into them more and more and think that is one reason I've stopped posting entries.
I've always thought of myself as an optimist in life, well really more so over the last 10-15 years, and felt that was also my approach to romance, that in time things would click for me and I'd be in that happy space with someone special in my life, but I've started to seriously doubt that is going to happen and it's been just emotionally draining the past year or so and really impacting me thesse past couple of months more than it has ever been in my life.
Waking up alone didn't used to bother me and know I absolutely hate the weekends as there is so much damn dead time on my hands, one can only read so much, watch movies on Netflix, or dare I say golf so many times before time just seems to slow down to a crawl.
I've tried to date but that has been a complete disaster and leaves me wondering how many nasty people are out there just waiting to prey upon those actually hoping to make a connection, based on some of my own recent experiences I'm voting on far too fucking many for my liking.
So I've been isolating myself from any expression of my emotions and just focusing on little things like spending time with Moki, a couple of projects around the house, and my golf game until the recent onset of the aforementioned shoulder injury.
I don't know when I'll honestly be back to posting regular blog entries in a timely manner, if they'll even be focused on dating or relationships anymore, but I'll try to post now and again so people can stop asking if the blog is over, it's not, at least not yet.
I've said it before that love can hurt as much as it can feel good, but I never envisioned the lack of love in my life feeling so horrible as it as these past few years...........
My name is Marcus and I blog about all kinds of things, used to be mostly about the search for love, relationships, and finding my true one, but let's be honest and admit my odds of success are pretty damn low these days.
Questions and comments are always welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
My musical suggestion for the day is "Into Your Hideout" by Pilate
So it's been more than a little while since I last posted and I've received a few messages asking me what the fuck is going on with me and if I'm alright (FYI that F bomb was verbatim from one of the messages so I don't think it is wrong to use it in this entry).
The honest truth is that I don't have a clue what's going on other than to admit I'm struggling big time with things and am really trying to get my shit together, with what appears to be and feels like little to no success so far.
I should be happy with the majority of my life right now as my health is good, other than some tendinitis in my right rotator cuff that is playing hell with my golf swing, work is going so well that I've not had one day where I wasn't involved with something new, my kids are doing really well, as is that little man Jack who owns me heart and soul.
But having said all of that I'm not myself and don't know how to snap out of it to get myself back to where I was happy with my life.
I took an internal vow when I started to write this blog that I wouldn't ever let my own moods become part of any entry and I've noticed my moodiness slipping into them more and more and think that is one reason I've stopped posting entries.
I've always thought of myself as an optimist in life, well really more so over the last 10-15 years, and felt that was also my approach to romance, that in time things would click for me and I'd be in that happy space with someone special in my life, but I've started to seriously doubt that is going to happen and it's been just emotionally draining the past year or so and really impacting me thesse past couple of months more than it has ever been in my life.
Waking up alone didn't used to bother me and know I absolutely hate the weekends as there is so much damn dead time on my hands, one can only read so much, watch movies on Netflix, or dare I say golf so many times before time just seems to slow down to a crawl.
I've tried to date but that has been a complete disaster and leaves me wondering how many nasty people are out there just waiting to prey upon those actually hoping to make a connection, based on some of my own recent experiences I'm voting on far too fucking many for my liking.
So I've been isolating myself from any expression of my emotions and just focusing on little things like spending time with Moki, a couple of projects around the house, and my golf game until the recent onset of the aforementioned shoulder injury.
I don't know when I'll honestly be back to posting regular blog entries in a timely manner, if they'll even be focused on dating or relationships anymore, but I'll try to post now and again so people can stop asking if the blog is over, it's not, at least not yet.
I've said it before that love can hurt as much as it can feel good, but I never envisioned the lack of love in my life feeling so horrible as it as these past few years...........
My name is Marcus and I blog about all kinds of things, used to be mostly about the search for love, relationships, and finding my true one, but let's be honest and admit my odds of success are pretty damn low these days.
Questions and comments are always welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
My musical suggestion for the day is "Into Your Hideout" by Pilate
Monday, May 13, 2019
Monday Finds Me Torn Between Two Emotions
Monday, May 13/19
I find myself torn between two diametrically opposite emotions thanks to my son.
You see he left on holiday this morning for a week in Punta Cana down in the Dominican Republic.
There's a group of 5 of them who have gone down and I know all of them in one way or another, one from his years playing hockey, two from having played on a soccer team with him that I coached, and one from his high school. All of them are good lads in their own ways.
So what are my opposed emotions?
Excitement and bone wrenching terror.
I'm excited for him taking his first independent holiday, one he researched on his own and booked through a travel agent known to the family, one he organized with his buddies, and one he's earned after a tough school year that included a breakup that left him more than a bit down in the dumps.
I'm terrified that neither his mother or I will be close enough to help if anything bad happens. I know that is kind of an irrational thought but tell me when any parent hasn't engaged in such thought where their children are concerned and I'll show you a liar.
Help me out here readers, share with me your own stories about when someone close to you ventured out for the first time and how you handled it, I can really use some reassurances this week as I'm sure it's going to be one long damn week for me to endure.
His mom drove him and one of the other lads to Montreal last night as that is where they are flying out from and I'm picking them up next Monday around 5 pm eastern standard time. I'm going to try my best not to crush him to my chest in a hug when I see but not making any promises.
This is one of the milestone events we as parents have spent years preparing them for and yet I don't think we really consider what it means to us ourselves, we all want our children to be able to move forward through life without needing us and at the same time that same act means part of our own purpose has been fulfilled, leaving some of us to ponder what will fill that place in our lives.
I'm not implying our kids aren't part of us anymore but lets face it, once they taste that freedom they'll strive for it more and more, as they should with every fibre in their bodies, leaving us to face the whole empty nest syndrome. Something I'm actually kind of facing these days anyways given how little I do see my son between his school schedule, work, and social commitments.
Sometimes I feel like I need to schedule time with him so we can catch up with one another, does anyone else ever feel that way too?
It's going to be a long week but I'm sure I'll get through it and can't wait to hear some, likely not all, of the stories from his time down south on his own.
My name is Marcus and I might have shorter fingernails before the week is done ;-)
ooasm2018@gmail.com is the place to send any comments or questions.
I find myself torn between two diametrically opposite emotions thanks to my son.
You see he left on holiday this morning for a week in Punta Cana down in the Dominican Republic.
There's a group of 5 of them who have gone down and I know all of them in one way or another, one from his years playing hockey, two from having played on a soccer team with him that I coached, and one from his high school. All of them are good lads in their own ways.
So what are my opposed emotions?
Excitement and bone wrenching terror.
I'm excited for him taking his first independent holiday, one he researched on his own and booked through a travel agent known to the family, one he organized with his buddies, and one he's earned after a tough school year that included a breakup that left him more than a bit down in the dumps.
I'm terrified that neither his mother or I will be close enough to help if anything bad happens. I know that is kind of an irrational thought but tell me when any parent hasn't engaged in such thought where their children are concerned and I'll show you a liar.
Help me out here readers, share with me your own stories about when someone close to you ventured out for the first time and how you handled it, I can really use some reassurances this week as I'm sure it's going to be one long damn week for me to endure.
His mom drove him and one of the other lads to Montreal last night as that is where they are flying out from and I'm picking them up next Monday around 5 pm eastern standard time. I'm going to try my best not to crush him to my chest in a hug when I see but not making any promises.
This is one of the milestone events we as parents have spent years preparing them for and yet I don't think we really consider what it means to us ourselves, we all want our children to be able to move forward through life without needing us and at the same time that same act means part of our own purpose has been fulfilled, leaving some of us to ponder what will fill that place in our lives.
I'm not implying our kids aren't part of us anymore but lets face it, once they taste that freedom they'll strive for it more and more, as they should with every fibre in their bodies, leaving us to face the whole empty nest syndrome. Something I'm actually kind of facing these days anyways given how little I do see my son between his school schedule, work, and social commitments.
Sometimes I feel like I need to schedule time with him so we can catch up with one another, does anyone else ever feel that way too?
It's going to be a long week but I'm sure I'll get through it and can't wait to hear some, likely not all, of the stories from his time down south on his own.
My name is Marcus and I might have shorter fingernails before the week is done ;-)
ooasm2018@gmail.com is the place to send any comments or questions.
A Blog Entry That's Not So "G" Rated
Friday, May 10/19
I was driving to work this morning when I happened to drive past the West Ottawa Community Resources Center and noticed one of those portable signs businesses use to promote a sale or special event.
As a member of the west end community my family has partaken of the some of the services offered at the WOCRC in the form of some special speech development classes with my son when he was around 3-4 years old. We were fortunate to be paired up with a wonderful therapist who helped us get him past a little bump and onto normal speech development progression.
I always look at that building when I drive past with special warmth inside for all the good they do in the community, a lot of programs are advertised on the board outside along Castlefrank Road.
Nothing extraordinary about that and not what caught my eye and made my blood begin to boil this morning.
Now I don't take offence at this morning's sign posting but rather the very fact that it even needs to be said or set up as a special event.
So what has this blogger so upset? Here is this mornings sign.........
"May is Sexual Abuse Prevention Month"
Are you fucking kidding me?
Have we dropped so low as a society that we need to specifically set aside a month devoted to preventing sexual abuse?
Honestly, shouldn't every month be "Sexual Abuse Prevention Month"?
More like every week or better yet....how about every Goddamn Fucking Day be devoted to preventing sexual abuse!!!!!!!
I'm not upset with them for posting the sign as I get it, there are some real Darwin Award winners running around amongst us and these jewels of humanity most likely need the reminder.
No, I'm just upset that the lack common decency and basic knowledge make it so necessary to have to set aside a month to prevent something that is so fundamental to us as a people.
As a parent and now a grandparent I can honestly say I've been worried about abuse in all shapes and forms from the first day my daughter came into my life to the day my grandson came along.
I worried about my kids getting bullied, both physically and emotionally, and I hate to admit with all the recent stories coming out about sexual abuse in some of the schools that I've wondered if a conversation should be had with both of my kids, wondered until my own son commented about them and said there is no way he'd ever have let anyone do that to him and keep silent.
We live in a scary world, all 7+ billion of us, and that means that scary things can happen at the hands of some not very nice people, I get it and it makes my soul wrench in agony that bad things happen to good people, I wish there was something I could do to stop it but I am only one person standing on the beach trying to hold back the incoming tide so what can I really do.........
I can stand and make sure that I act in the best way possible towards my fellow humans, hopefully joining with others who feel the same and form a dike that helps to hold back the onslaught of despair and pain that might come from standing alone.
The Anglo-Irish statesman and philosopher Edmund Burke said it best when he said
Let us never forget this message, let us all strive to be good people, let us all stand up and do what we can to bring goodness to the world around us, and maybe, just maybe, our efforts won't go unnoticed and we will make the difference we so desperately want to see in our world.........
My name is Marcus and I vow that every single fucking day of my life is devoted to preventing abuse in any way, shape, or form. Not just for my own family but yours as well as we are only as strong as the effort we make.
Observations and comments are always welcome and you can reach me at the blogs email account ooasm2018@gmail.com
Nota bene: I suggest Googling the Darwin Awards if you don't understand the subtle insult referred in the blog. Unfortunately I have to admit to knowing one or two prime candidates for the award.
I was driving to work this morning when I happened to drive past the West Ottawa Community Resources Center and noticed one of those portable signs businesses use to promote a sale or special event.
As a member of the west end community my family has partaken of the some of the services offered at the WOCRC in the form of some special speech development classes with my son when he was around 3-4 years old. We were fortunate to be paired up with a wonderful therapist who helped us get him past a little bump and onto normal speech development progression.
I always look at that building when I drive past with special warmth inside for all the good they do in the community, a lot of programs are advertised on the board outside along Castlefrank Road.
Nothing extraordinary about that and not what caught my eye and made my blood begin to boil this morning.
Now I don't take offence at this morning's sign posting but rather the very fact that it even needs to be said or set up as a special event.
So what has this blogger so upset? Here is this mornings sign.........
"May is Sexual Abuse Prevention Month"
Are you fucking kidding me?
Have we dropped so low as a society that we need to specifically set aside a month devoted to preventing sexual abuse?
Honestly, shouldn't every month be "Sexual Abuse Prevention Month"?
More like every week or better yet....how about every Goddamn Fucking Day be devoted to preventing sexual abuse!!!!!!!
I'm not upset with them for posting the sign as I get it, there are some real Darwin Award winners running around amongst us and these jewels of humanity most likely need the reminder.
No, I'm just upset that the lack common decency and basic knowledge make it so necessary to have to set aside a month to prevent something that is so fundamental to us as a people.
As a parent and now a grandparent I can honestly say I've been worried about abuse in all shapes and forms from the first day my daughter came into my life to the day my grandson came along.
I worried about my kids getting bullied, both physically and emotionally, and I hate to admit with all the recent stories coming out about sexual abuse in some of the schools that I've wondered if a conversation should be had with both of my kids, wondered until my own son commented about them and said there is no way he'd ever have let anyone do that to him and keep silent.
We live in a scary world, all 7+ billion of us, and that means that scary things can happen at the hands of some not very nice people, I get it and it makes my soul wrench in agony that bad things happen to good people, I wish there was something I could do to stop it but I am only one person standing on the beach trying to hold back the incoming tide so what can I really do.........
I can stand and make sure that I act in the best way possible towards my fellow humans, hopefully joining with others who feel the same and form a dike that helps to hold back the onslaught of despair and pain that might come from standing alone.
The Anglo-Irish statesman and philosopher Edmund Burke said it best when he said
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
Let us never forget this message, let us all strive to be good people, let us all stand up and do what we can to bring goodness to the world around us, and maybe, just maybe, our efforts won't go unnoticed and we will make the difference we so desperately want to see in our world.........
My name is Marcus and I vow that every single fucking day of my life is devoted to preventing abuse in any way, shape, or form. Not just for my own family but yours as well as we are only as strong as the effort we make.
Observations and comments are always welcome and you can reach me at the blogs email account ooasm2018@gmail.com
Nota bene: I suggest Googling the Darwin Awards if you don't understand the subtle insult referred in the blog. Unfortunately I have to admit to knowing one or two prime candidates for the award.
Sunday, May 12, 2019
Happy Mother's Day
Sunday, May 12/19
I would like to send my best wishes on this Mother's Day to all the mom's out there raising children.
Of course in this day and age I feel the need to modify those best wishes as follows....
I'm sending them to all the mom's in a traditional partnership with a husband/fiance/boyfriend, all the mom's in a modern partnership with a wife, all the mom's doing it on their own, all the dad's acting like mom due to a loss or other unforeseen circumstances, and all the two dad families raising kids in this modern world.
Being a parent isn't easy, it doesn't require a test of any kind, though given some of the parents I've met over the years I wonder why we don't require one, and it doesn't come with any instruction manuals, heaven knows those might have come in handy a few times.
We don't get paid to be a parent and more often than not are overlooked for that which we do in terms of helping our children grow up feeling wanted, loved, and protected.
Often the compensation we receive comes in the form of another person making a favourable comment on how our child acts with other or adults. I can't tell you how often I've received compliments on how well mannered my son is and I know both my own mother and grandfather are looking down at me with a smile, knowing I took the lessons they tried to instill in me to heart and have passed along to my own children.
But the best compensation I receive is seeing them smile and the hug my son will walk up and give me out of the blue without any bidding on my part, whether his friends are around or not.
So to all of you out there doing the whole parent thing.....keep up the good work and I hope all of you get a special hug today from those little things we've spent countless hours teaching and worrying about.
My name is Marcus and the greatest thing I've ever done is to be a parent to one amazing daughter and one awesome son.
Today's musical suggestion is "Butterfly Kisses" by Bob Carlisle. Makes me think of my little girl every single time I hear it. Tho she isn't so little anymore, she'll always be this daddy's little girl.
Questions and comments, both good and bad, welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
I would like to send my best wishes on this Mother's Day to all the mom's out there raising children.
Of course in this day and age I feel the need to modify those best wishes as follows....
I'm sending them to all the mom's in a traditional partnership with a husband/fiance/boyfriend, all the mom's in a modern partnership with a wife, all the mom's doing it on their own, all the dad's acting like mom due to a loss or other unforeseen circumstances, and all the two dad families raising kids in this modern world.
Being a parent isn't easy, it doesn't require a test of any kind, though given some of the parents I've met over the years I wonder why we don't require one, and it doesn't come with any instruction manuals, heaven knows those might have come in handy a few times.
We don't get paid to be a parent and more often than not are overlooked for that which we do in terms of helping our children grow up feeling wanted, loved, and protected.
Often the compensation we receive comes in the form of another person making a favourable comment on how our child acts with other or adults. I can't tell you how often I've received compliments on how well mannered my son is and I know both my own mother and grandfather are looking down at me with a smile, knowing I took the lessons they tried to instill in me to heart and have passed along to my own children.
But the best compensation I receive is seeing them smile and the hug my son will walk up and give me out of the blue without any bidding on my part, whether his friends are around or not.
So to all of you out there doing the whole parent thing.....keep up the good work and I hope all of you get a special hug today from those little things we've spent countless hours teaching and worrying about.
My name is Marcus and the greatest thing I've ever done is to be a parent to one amazing daughter and one awesome son.
Today's musical suggestion is "Butterfly Kisses" by Bob Carlisle. Makes me think of my little girl every single time I hear it. Tho she isn't so little anymore, she'll always be this daddy's little girl.
Questions and comments, both good and bad, welcome at ooasm2018@gmail.com
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