Shut Up Gary!!!!

Saturday, June 03/17

"Shut up Gary!!"

Those words were ringing through my head most of the morning as I slogged my way through one of my worst rounds of golf in the last few years.

It's not that I was playing horribly but rather that I couldn't for the life of me string together more than two consecutive good swings during the entire round. I'd hit a huge drive, well huge for me at 240 yards, and than immediately shank my 3 wood an amazing 75 yards. Talk about wasting the previous shot and making a total muck of things.

I'd like to say that part of the problem was that fickle bitch Mother Nature and her steadfast refusal to allow summer to get here but I'm not sure she was the entire problem this morning.

Now on the subject of the weather this morning.......I was half expecting to get a first snow of the season discount as both Brandt and I were convinced we were going to see snow fall before the round was over......how cold was it? well it actually got colder as we played and not warmer as is the norm.

So why was I so upset with Gary and who the hell is this guy that he can make me so mad?

Gary is my inner voice.

Stop laughing, we all have one and I just happened to name mine Gary. It's a better than using Marcus as that would just be too weird now wouldn't it.

Gary likes to remind me of the distances I used to be able to hit, convincing me I still can, and than smirks when I leave my wedge short, as if I should have known better. Damn Gary and his mocking laugh.

Every now and again Gary will put just a twinge of doubt in the back of my mind in that little space he's carved out that makes me second guess my club selection.

Normally Gary likes to get me to up club after a good shot, making me think I can pull it off again. Case in point this morning after a great tee shot off on the finishing 18th that went about 265 yards and still left me over 280 yards from the green I started to reach for my 4 hybrid knowing I could use it to get me to within 100 yards and possibly finish the round with a chance at birdie or par at worst, but Gary had other plans, reminding me that as well as I hit that 4 I should be able to hit my new 3 hybrid even better, even though I hadn't used it all morning, so instead of doing what I knew was best for this shot I listened to Gary.........and promptly hit a knuckle shot that barely cleared the creek a hundred yards in front of me............where I did hit the 4 hybrid and smoked the crap out of it to just sit off the edge of the green......stupid Gary.

Even though I know Gary does not have my best interests at heart and costs me strokes during my rounds I also know I'm far from done listening to him when I play.....not just because I'm a glutton for punishment, which I am since I acknowledge being a golfer, but mostly due to the fact that his little jabs to man up and hit certain clubs has been beneficial to my game in that I know do hit my driver every chance I get, I'm pulling my 3 wood out on more of the longer par 3's that are running in excess of 200 yards, and I'll continue to do so going forward.

Gary might cost me some strokes now and again, ok more often than I'd like, but he has also helped get my game to the point where I can realistically see myself breaking 90 on a consistent basis this summer, when it arrives that is.

Now I can hear Gary chortling from his dank dark little cave and that's fine for now, he's sort of earned that right these past couple of years as he's also been there when I was dealing with all kinds of things reminding me that taking chances and failing always beats than sitting back and not even trying.

Shut up Gary, nobody wants to hear your thoughts on why I'm single...................

What do you call your inner voice, that source of doubt and confidence, that drive that keeps you moving forward?

Marcus