Monday, April 08/19
and I'm still no closer to finding my elusive one than I was at the start of this blog.
Actually it's over 6 years as I began this little adventure on my profile on my first dating site, don't bother searching for it as it's long since been deleted.
So my one takeaway from all of this is that as much as you might want the one in your life there is no guarantee that life is going to see things your way and bring them to you......
I'll admit there are times I'm so frustrated by it all that I just want to toss in the towel, say "Fuck it", and make my unofficial vow of celibacy official.........
But than I'll be out running an errand and I'll see a couple so obviously in love, that head over heels, moon floating high in the sky, kind of attraction where they just look at one another with the knowledge that anything goes......
That always seems to bring me back to my own desire to have someone in my life.
Do I need someone in my life?
No, I've managed well on my own, bought a couple of cars, a house, put some money away for my son's university tuition, my own retirement, taken a vacation or two, and even had a golf membership along the way.
Life has been good but I know it could be better and that's what I want....the better than good that being part of something special can bring.....that mathematically incorrect formula where one plus one equals far more than the two we've come to expect.....
I want someone to drunk dial me at 2 am after a night out with her girls and tell me to get my cute ass over to her place.
I want someone to show up at my place on a Sunday morning with warm croissants and a cup of French Vanilla coffee for me as we cuddle and talk about everything that crosses our minds.
There are times I feel like just chucking it all in, blog included, and then ask myself where else can I get such cheap therapy sessions that might help me finally get over the crap in my head and make some progress in life.
I sincerely hope some of the entries have been more help to you than they've been to me in finding that person who is perfectly imperfect for you.
There is one, maybe two or three, for all of us and they say timing is everything.
Damn those "they's" and the logic of timing lol
My name is Marcus and I'm tired of being alone, but not so tired that I'd willingly enter into a relationship so I could have someone in my life, that wouldn't be fair to myself or honest with them.
I don't have any more of a clue today than I did yesterday or will probably have tomorrow if I'm going to ever meet my one, but I was so close once before that I know the possibility exists for me to grab that brass ring again, if just all the star perfectly align as the moon crests full in the night sky.
Sounds like I might be overreaching a bit and asking for too much doesn't it?
Maybe I am and Karma will come along and bitch slap me back to reality.......but there is also the outside chance that I might just run into her at Loblaws reaching for the same box of cereal or bump into her at Chapters looking at recent releases or if I'm really lucky, at the Kevin Haime Golf Centre where we both go to work on our short game and end up chatting about the proper way to read a green. God only knows what could happen if I just keep an open mind.
So no matter how frustrated or sad I might get at times, I'm going to do my best to remember that without any effort on my part nothing will ever come to pass as I'd like..........
Questions and comments welcome as always at ooasm2018@gmail.com
Tonight's musical suggestion is Snow Patrol's reworked "Chasing Cars" and the YouTube link is right here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEeTaF7unrc
Here's to another 6 years but hopefully some of those future blog posts might be about my new girlfriend and awesome relationship where we both enjoy making the other smile and tease each other with little kisses......it could happen
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