Saturday, June 13/15
Today's song is "God Only Knows" by The Beach Boys
This is the song that plays at the end of Love Actually and has to rank up there as one of the most underrated movies and one of my favourite - it is my go to movie when I'm having some doubts about love........
Today started off as any regular weekend does with me taking Moki for a walk this morning followed by running some errands. None of them were special or earth shattering in the least, not unless wandering around Chapters, booking a service appointment at Kanata Hyundai, pricing a shelf system for the basement at Lowe's, or getting lunch at Fusion in Stittsville rank up there in your world as major events.
Now I live in Kanata and love it. Almost everything I need is within 5-10 kilometers of my house and that means I never have to leave unless something comes up that I can find or do in Kanata. My kids soccer games or a round of golf are usually the only events that see me visit any other part of Ottawa.
The exception to that rule was when I was dating C for she lived out in the east end in Orleans, directly opposite to my own neck of the woods and to get there you've got to deal with not only the distance but some major highway construction going on related to the new light rail system.
I used to tease her about needing my passport in order to go out to her place but the truth of the matter is that the drive didn't bother me at all, there were times I enjoyed it as it gave me time to think about things and one was how lucky I was to have a reason to make that drive....well had I guess you'd say now
So today after I got home from lunch and errands I kicked around the house doing some odd chores, took Moki for another walk, and than cut the front lawn. All of that took me to 4:30 so I took a quick shower and headed over to Pet Smart to get the wonder puppy some treats and that is when things went off rail for me.
Pet Smart is located in the Kanata Centrum and near three of my favourite places: Golf Town, Baton Rouge, and Milestones. All three hold a special place for me for different reasons. I used to go to Golf Town when it was my dad weekend and for fun I`d take a picture of golf clubs and send it to C with some witty little comment like "Early birthday gift?" and she'd usually respond back telling me I better not buy myself anything and I'd smile like an idiot in love. Baton Rouge was our place to go for a nice steak or prime rib dinner and more than once we wandered in after seeing a late afternoon movie on a Saturday for a nice dinner around some great conversation. Now Milestones is kind of unique as that was one of two places we'd go for Sunday breakfast and I doubt it is anywhere I'll ever go again with anyone else as those memories are just way too special to me.
So as I was coming out of Pet Smart and getting into my car I happened to look up to see Milestones sitting there across the parking lot and I guess I sort of zoned out as I started thinking about the high table we used to sit at and talk about having in our place when she cycled back from her new posting in 2 years as the next thing I knew a couple were standing across my car from asking if everything was OK. I blinked and said yes, why were they asking, they sort of exchanged a look and the man told me I'd been standing there for almost 3 minutes and my eyes were glistening. I was totally embarrassed but told them the truth, that seeing Milestones reminded me of a special person who wasn't in my life and I hoped I hadn't scared them. The woman smiled and said she hoped that person knew how I felt and that seeing me react like I did was heartwarming as she must have meant a lot to me.
I thanked them again and got into my car to drive home. Once home I could not shake the funk and had to turn to Love Actually to help me. Now some of you might find that strange as the movie is about relationships, the majority of them just getting started but for me that is like an elixir, it gives me hope that while I'm kind of miserable at the moment that one day I'll have back what I lost.
I've been doing really well the last few weeks dealing with things but every now and something happens or I get a reminder of what I've lost. Last week was one such week as I've been going through some telephone calls that look like they might prove really beneficial career wise and I've had nobody to share them with as it's not something my teenage son is interested in hearing nor his older twenty something sister lol
Week after next is going to be extra difficult for me as that week has a special day for C that I wish I could see but can't, not that I won't be thinking of her come 10am on June 23rd
So today is coming to a close, one that started out with promise, reminded me of someone I cherished and lost, and now comes full circle in offering me some hope for the future.
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