New Guy @ Lunch

Wednesday, June 24/2015

Well as I've recently posted, I've started a new position and it feels pretty good to be back using my brain for something other than trying to figure out whether I should cut the front lawn or take Moki for yet another walk.

I will say the last few weeks have been actually good for me in a lot of ways. First, I've developed a much better appreciation for my spending habits and how making some subtle changes can have a large impact on my savings. Secondly, the free time allowed me to get a tremendous amount of things off my to-do list that I never seemed to get around to on the weekends. My house is much cleaner now from having purged rooms of stuff I know my son and I will never use again, much to the benefit of Value Village, as well as my hall closet now having only prescriptions and over the counter remedies for various things that are current and not past an expiry date.

When I landed my new position I had one final meeting with my career coach and we talked about ways to approach being the new guy. One thing I've always been is a bit of a loner and I told him that was something I wanted to confront right off the bat and he thought that was a great start but asked how I was going to go about it. I told him when volunteers were sought for company events I was going to stand up and get myself chosen and to handle the day to day aspect I was going to actually talk to people outside of the daily responsibilities I've got on my plate.

Our building has a cafeteria where you can buy your lunch or just take your made at home meal and sit at a table with coworkers and chat.  So far I've been out to lunch twice with people from my department but today was the real test as I brought my lunch, and saved myself about $8 as well, and went to eat it in the cafeteria.  When I entered there was a few empty table, some with employees from other companies in the building,  some occupied by engineers from mine, and one with members of the sales & marketing team.  Now old me would have walked to one of the empty tables and ate lunch while reading my tablet but new me left the tablet in my bag at my desk and walked over the marketing group and asked if anyone was using the empty seat, upon being told no and to join them I did just that - points for me!!

Now while sitting there they took the opportunity to ask me lots of questions about myself and I did my best to be open with my responses. There is one woman who is hilarious and pretty much the glue that holds the place together, she makes sure everyone has the stuff they need and has been on me every day if I needed anything to complete my desk space. Her name starts with L so we'll just use that when talking about her.

As the Q&A session wound down she leaned forward and stated very openly that everyone was a big chicken and how come it always fell to her to ask the key question? She looked at me and tongue in cheek said "since they won't address the elephant in the room let me, are you single or attached?"

To say the table almost broke up laughing would be an understatement.  I looked around and realized this question had been floated around among the majority of the floor and it dawned on me that I hadn't given anyone a clue as to my status other than to mention my kids and having an ex.

I took a moment and looked out the window to catch my train of thought and a woman who goes by S said that was kind of a personal question and I didn't have to answer. I smiled and said in for a penny in for a dollar and replied that I was single. That was all I said but you could see the wheels turning with some of them. I guess at some point my 3rd rule of dating is going to come into play - Rule #3 Don't date where you work.

Lunch broke up and back to work we went. My afternoon has been going not too bad when S stopped by my desk and leaned over to softly tell me "You're in love with someone but dealing with a broken heart aren't you?"  I jerked my head and looked directly at her and she smiled and before I could say anything added "It was in your eyes when you looked out the window when L asked you"

I nodded and said I thought I'd turned the page on those feelings but got a heady reminder yesterday that my heart was still owned by another. S just smiled at me, patted me on the arm, and said to me that love wasn't done with me yet so don't give up and then walked back to her desk and took a call from a vendor in Germany.

Now I have no clue how she figured that out from just my facial expressions as I know I haven't said a word to anyone here about my private life but somehow it was there for her to see.

What does this mean for me? I don't have a clue and am going to try like hell not to read too much into it but the reminders from yesterday did leave me a little weak kneed and resulted in a restless sleep.

On the plus side I've been doing just what I wanted and being much more approachable :)