The Ego Boost

Sunday, March 06/16


So a little while back I briefly wrote about an encounter I had at the movies that sort of assured me that I won't always be alone and than never followed up with the story as promised.

Well consider my promise now kept.................

I've never let being single or alone hold me back from living my life and doing things that make me happy. This includes going out for a meal or to see a movie, of course both of those are so much better when shared with someone, as I learned after a long time doing things by myself.

Now the past few months haven't been easy and have seen me struggling to develop any kind of rhythm, for want of a better word, in my life since October.

A couple of weeks ago I made the decision to go and catch a movie so I wouldn't spend another Saturday night home alone. I ended up getting to the theatre a little early and went to get some popcorn and a drink to enjoy during the movie - I mean what beats some good movie theatre popcorn right?

So there I was in a rather long line when I heard a voice behind me asking if it could be any slower, I turned around to see if the question was being directed towards me or if I just caught part of a conversation between two people, discovering a woman standing behind me looking at the refreshment stand with a somewhat agitated look about her. She saw me looking and gave a nervous laugh as she said "I'm guessing I just said that out loud didn't I?"

I smiled at her and said not to worry as I did the same thing all the time, usually at the worst possible moment. She said she was cutting it close for her movie but just had to have some popcorn. I laughed and said I had plenty of time till the start of mine and she could move in front of me if she liked, she thanked me and edged past as I asked her what she was seeing, she replied "The Finest Hours" as she totally loved Chris Pine.  She took a moment to realize that last part was said with a  tad bit of a huskiness in her voice and sort of blushed. Thinking to be nice she asked what I was seeing and I laughed and said nothing as redeeming as hers and I was almost embarrassed to admit I was there to watch "Dirty Grandpa" with Robert De Niro and Zach Effron, telling her I really liked how De Niro carried off the comedy in "The Intern" with Anne Hatheway and I could use a laugh or two.

She smiled at me and glanced forward to see how the line was moving. She turned back to me and asked how I was able to get my wife to come see that movie and I laughed and said I was wasn't married and was there by myself. She paused as we reached the front of the line and it was her turn to move forward to place her order, looking around momentarily, she said "if you're movie isn't any good come find me in theatre 23" and with that we ended up at opposite ends of the counter.

Now to be clear....I didn't go find her and when I mentioned this to a friend all he could do was shake his head at me.

It was nice to hear something like that but the truth is that I wasn't in any shape to try such a thing at that time as thoughts of someone else were bouncing around the empty warehouse I call my brain.

I know that at some point in time I've got to get back out there as I'm sure nobody is pining away for me but it just isn't that time quite yet for me, closer today than I was a month ago, but still not quite there.

I think my daughter senses things are getting better for me in that area as when she was hugging me goodbye after dinner yesterday she softly told me "It's time to start finding happiness again, you're an amazing man and deserve to be with someone"

Sometimes I really wish my kids weren't so damn perceptive about things but than again if they weren't I'd question who the heck they were lol

Marcus


So as I was writing this entry I was doing my usual thing of listening to music on YouTube and Spotify when I came across one of the most beautiful instrumental arrangements I've heard in a very long time. So much that I just sat back and let it flow around and through me....ending with tears falling down my cheeks at the emotions it brought out in me.

The Cinematic Orchestra "Arrival of the Birds & Transformation"

You can find a link to the video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqoANESQ4cQ