Today's musical recommendation -
"Scream" by Chris Cornell
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Today's topic might seem a tad bit out
there but as usual there is a method to my madness, of course I'm usually the
only one who understands it.....except of course for the other
voices.......just kidding.....really he is...
Emotions course through each of us as naturally
as oxygen and plasma.........but we don't always want to face these emotions or
even acknowledge their existence at times.....emotions can be scary and make us
step back from the abyss....or they can make us take that one additional step
that plunges us over the edge
Sometimes that ride can be so fear inducing
it leaves us gasping for our very breathe and fighting to retain our
souls......sometimes it is just what we need to give ourselves a mental slap
and force us back into the game we like to call life....
Sometimes we fight to control our emotions
so they don't take over.....love is one we tend to take a stand against.....we
fear getting hurt so we put shields up and don't let anyone get close enough to
make our hearts ache with pain.....pain of rejection.....pain of withdrawal.......but
unless we are willing to accept the possibility of such pain than we'll never
be able to exult in the pure unadulterated pleasure that love can bring
us.....that we each deserve........
I've cried over lost family.....over lost
loves......at finding love......at a movie that made me pause and think......I
cried at my wedding......the birth of my son......the graduation of my daughter
from high school.......the end of my marriage..........and I'm sure there will
be more times in the future when I cry again........
Thursday afternoon I cried while driving
from my son's grade six graduation.........the pride and joy I felt were so
intense that I almost couldn't breathe.........the last few years have
presented me with some major tasks to overcome and deal with......one involved
my son..........and as I walked him back to his mom from giving him his grad
gift, his own cell phone, he looked at me and asked me how I was doing as he
leaned against me....I smiled and said "one of the 4 best days of my
life".......he looked up at me and asked if I felt like crying as my eyes
looked watery and I confessed I did given all we'd been through and he smiled
back at me and reminded me that living in the present was the gift of life........
As I drove home he sent me his first text..."Dad I love you and appreciate all you do for me, I am the person I am because of you and mom"..........and you guessed it.....I cried
Does crying make me any less a man? I'm
sure there are some who will feel that way and to them I say I don't care what
you think.......I'm not afraid to show my emotions......and if my children
learn only one thing from me I hope that is has been to share how they feel
about things, to never hold back, to be willing to express yourself and show
the world that things matter to you is the biggest asset they possess.....
When did you last cry and what made you cry??????
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